Comparing Your Life

Good morning friends and family! I hope this week is going well, and I pray your lives are filled with joy and happiness as ours are. While Andrea was in the hospital with Logan this past week, I stayed at home because of my symptoms and visited them as often as I could. In the evening, I often went for a walk by myself to clear my head and to get some exercise.

While I was I walking, I saw a father and two young boys approaching from the opposite direction on bicycles. As they passed, we said hello and exchanged the usual greetings. The father’s answer was short, but it was a response that stuck with me for the remainder of my walk. He stated he was tired and exhausted, and they continued on their way.

At this point in my week, I had not slept more than two hours in each of the past three nights; my hemoglobin was decreased; my wife and I have a newborn son to compliment our non-stop toddler; I was discharged from chemotherapy just 4 days earlier; and I am fighting for my life. Honestly, we all of two routes to go when confronted with this scenario of comparing lives. We can self loathe, ask why did my life get the short stick, and exhaust our energy comparing who has it worse. Or we can be thankful for everything we have that is good. We can be thankful, hope, and pray that this other person’s greatest tragedy in life is nothing worse than his feeling of “exhaustion and tired” at that moment.

I chose the latter route for many reasons. My mother always taught me to never compare your day to another, especially your spouse. We all have obstacles to tackle every single day. They are never the same for any of us. If you think about it, it is truly impossible to compare ones life to another because we are all so unique and different. We each have different stepping stones in our history to get us to where we are. Furthermore, we can not exhaust our time worrying about someone else’s good fortune. We should always be excited, happy, and thankful for their happiness because, no matter the situation, we all have something in our lives to be happy and excited about. Life is too short, and we all have our unique blessings to be thankful for.

We should always share in each other’s joy in life, and never sulk in sorrows. To be able to smile alongside someone else, it has profound effects on your ability to accomplish anything, to overcome grief, and to fight any fight. Happiness truly is the best medicine, and I know this now more than ever.

We still don’t know what my future holds, but know I am smiling with you in every picture you post, every fun night out you have, every fun vacation and every new accomplishment you achieve in life. I love my life, and I choose to smile and laugh often, especially when faced with adversity.

It is important to always be happy with your lives. When life throws you a curve ball, dig deep to find something to smile about. Look at your child, your spouse, your diploma, and anything else that has helped you get this far with a smile on your face. We cannot avoid troublesome times, but we can get through them if we walk side by side. We can get through them if we know we are not alone, and that the possibility of experiencing joy and happiness is always there.

Thank you for all you do for us. We do not want to do this alone, and we cannot do this alone. It has been awhile since any bad news has surfaced from us, but please know this is far from over. We have a PET scan for me this Friday to determine the effects of chemotherapy. To say we are nervous and scared is an understatement. Keep us in your thoughts, and please don’t stop praying for a full recovery. We love you all and look forward to many more years sharing our lives with you. Make it a great day everyone!

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7 Responses to Comparing Your Life

  1. Donna Holmes says:

    Good Morning Ryan: It’s Brad’s Mom. He has been sending me pics of Landon and Logan and those are the sweetest pics I’ve ever seen. I hope that today is a wonderful day for you, Andrea, and the boys. Do something fun today and smile, smile, smile. Praying hard!

  2. sandy maclean says:

    Sitting here claiming on good things and good news for you on Friday. Thank you for the update and positive message. Enjoy today, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. Miss you Ryan and would still love to meet your family.

  3. JoAnn Kramer says:

    Remember nothing is impossible. Look at the spelling “I’m Possible”
    Sending prayers and Happy thoughts. Congratulations to you and your family on the blessing of a new son. God is definitely with you all.

  4. Dave says:

    Hey Ryan,

    Praying for you man. Just wanted to send you a link from one of my favorite ministers about how God wants you well I would highly recommend it. Hope it helps!

  5. Nicole says:

    Thank you for the reminder, Ryan! It is so easy to become self-focused – we were graced with this same wisdom: To compare yourself with no one but yourself and Christ. I was about to grumble, though, and this post pulled me up short – thanks! Praying for you and the PET scan, brother! Love you!

  6. Kim says:

    You have a very wise mom! 🙂 Comparing ourselves to others never works. It would actually shock us to know what people we cross paths with are actually going through. Living in a sinful world brings hardships but we have a choice, as you say, what road to take. Thanks for encouraging us to take the high road, look at the blessings we have and pray that the people we come across are able to handle whatever they are going through too. We Love You Ryan! (We Love you Andrea!!! And Landon! And Logan!) Strength and Peace to you this Friday!! We’ll be praying for GREAT results!!

  7. Hi Ryan,
    I found you through a Facebook friend. I wanted you to know you are in my daily prayers. I have fought and beaten kidney and breast cancer. It was very rough but I felt like God was walking with me every step of the way. Trust in His Will and Divine Mercy. You are sooo young to be going through this. God bless you and your family. Keep the wonderful ‘positive’ attitude!

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